Its the day after thanksgiving I been depress for some time , there is many things that people don t know about my life .
thanks for all the emails , to post comments in my blog and phone calls that I got true this week .
thursday was a meditation day for me .
What people think of me the first time ?
usually they think Im a bitch , just because Im very quiet . I study people first and I don t open up to people that easy , some of my best friend they did not like me at first , its difficult for me to make friends . I never had friends when I was a kid I was over protected by my family .
Yes Im Bi-polar : I can't control my self all my BF and family members had told me , that I cant control my self I can be a second happy the next I want to kill my self .
and yes I did try to kill my self 2 times when I was younger , I know many people think ; that I look good but I don t I never seen my self as good looking ,many don t understand but I have so many complex , like most models , they all have some kind of drama , that people don t see most do not like there life or them selves .
some have to hear every day that they are Amazing , but that is not me I don t need that .I do what I think is correct I never done anything because I think the rest of the world think that is what you have to do .
sorry but my blog is the way I express my self so different then most models is not that extravagant and full of a fantasy life that they want you to think thats how they live 24/7 .
when people get to know me they know I m the best friend I can be , and Ill be there for long time no matter what .
and i dont choose my friends because they are good looking, or the most popular ,I choose my friends because they are real I dont look for the out side I look at the inside . same with my BF .
in my eyes every one is great or they can be great but if you ever see me with a mad face and quiet is because I m studying
people .
I put a photo I never done drag but this was a few month ago I was looking at old photos and I found this one , where they choose me in a theater show to play a dead priest that they dress as a women on steel magnolia ,
the other photo is me on thanksgiving day just a day ago
well happy thanksgiving day yes its not turkey day like some people say .
After I closed my store december 24 , Ill de visiting NY and miami in february both cities that I haven t visit in almost a year .
